The Broken Portal

Julian Tsai

Tucked in the southeast corner of Shanghai laid the ethereal Minhang district, a Narnia-like world that transposed you out of China. A mere wasteland less than two decades ago, it was now furnished with malls, people, subway stations, and other decorations. It was like the area was ferociously built with lego blocks by a child after Christmas. International schools of all countries situated themselves here, and to accompany them, countless high-end gated communities. Each one exhibited a unique environment that embodied different auras. Highland Park gifted you a tour of Korea, Sasfè teleported you to western Europe, and Stratford brought you to the brick-tiled Netherlands. Neighboring the American school was The Ridges. Through the gracefully slow opening wooden gates, the man-made river that ran through the whole compound could be heard flowing like it was real. Robins flirtatiously chirped at each other as they dashed from branch to branch. Identical looking red-tiled Mediterranean houses numbered one to 250 were dispersed through the 60 acred land; some formed a semi-circle near the entrance, some lined the main road. Near the clubhouse sat number 77, one of the bigger units in The Ridge. Within its decently-sized backyard, various sports equipment and barbecue essentials carpeted the grass. Extending out the left corner of the garden, next to the trampoline, a dainty small path lined with grey limestones big enough for one asian-sized foot wrapped around the house. On the other side of the floor-to-ceiling windows, a deafening silence permeated through the darkened living room and kitchen. The dishes were clean, the table was empty, and the tv was off. A pile of unfolded comforters was asleep on the couch. The spiraling staircase led to the father’s wine cellar, the sister’s messy pink hideout, the parent’s master bedroom, and the son’s small sanctuary. Every room had its lights off except for the one at the end of the left hallway. Behind the white door plastered with stickers and posters that were as old as the inhabitant inside, Cormac sat on his desk, illuminated by the bright almost full moon, typing away on his computer. 

It was junior year of high school. College applications were due sooner than later now, causing people to think about things they never had to before. For some, their frontier of possibilities had extended beyond the gates for the first time in their lives, whether it had been acknowledged or not. For others, not so much. A good majority of Cormac’s graduating class were planning to transition straight into the newly formed university that was incorporated within the American high school. Receiving nonchalant opinions from his parents and counselors, Cormac was still contemplating his next step. He was a bit dubious about joining the American school’s university, but it still intrigued him a little. After all, this place was his childhood, and a lot of his friends have already decided to do so, freeing them from any schoolwork for the rest of high school. Of course, this notion tempted high schoolers. It is in their nature. 

Slipping through the cracks of the night’s abyss, muffled sounds of shoes rubbing sternly against brick tiles emitted from Cormac’s balcony door. Cormac’s ears slightly prickled at the sound, but his attention towards his computer remained unwavering. Not long after, the door was opened carelessly, sending in cool drafts of the fall breeze, along with a person dressed in grey sweatpants and a white hoodie that said ‘SAS varsity rugby.’

“Didn’t know you would actually be relatively on time today Louis, how you doing?” Cormac said as he extended his right hand to dab him up.

“Good, good. Jesus, It’s colder outside than I expected though. Siri told me it would be around 15 degrees, but that’s definitely not 15.” Louis replied as he took off his jacket and routinely sat on the edge of Cormac’s bed, right beside the desk. 

“You did pretty well today climbing up the balcony. I almost didn’t hear you. You know we not trying to get caught again. Nice hoodie though.”

“I’m telling you, it’s that new route I found. After your hands reach the top, instead of stepping on the pipes on the left, just lunge and step on the brick on the right. I think it's much easier and definitely quieter. You should try it later. That pipe is going to break one day.”

“Maybe, but I’m already pretty swift with it. You’re the one that’s hella noisy.”

Louis chuckled a little in response as he walked to the bathroom. Through the sound of the running faucet, Cormac continued the conversation.

“Aye, what do you think about Copenhagen?”

“What? Copa what?”

“I said how you feel about Copenhagen. Copenhagen.”

Louis turned off the faucet and wiped his hands on Cormac’s towel.

“I don’t know, I've never been. What you doing thinking about Copenhagen. Your family going next break?” Louis said, walking back to his original spot.

“Nah, not that. You know I was just looking around, on that website the school gave us, it got all the universities, including their average statistics and all. Like for your GPA and stuff. I was scanning it when I saw some Unis in Copenhagen, and then I was searching online and watching videos of the city. Bro, it’s so beautiful! And the school is great, and I mean I’ve never been to that part of Europe actually.”

“mm really? Nice, nice.” 

“Maybe Copenhagen. Or the US. Chicago, New York. I keep seeing them movies shot there, New York. That would be pretty cool too.”

“umm I don’t know. New York, I’ve been. I don’t think it was that nice. Maybe cuz it was hella cramped, or maybe the weather, but I just didn’t feel that good when I was there. Kinda more mentally. Not sure. But yo it's already 1:30, move outta there and let me roll the J.” 

Louis sprung to life, jumping to his feet. He grabbed his small knapsack by the beanbag while Cormac saved his documents, closed his computer, then traded places with Louis. 

“Move this too,” Louis exclaimed as he lightly threw Cormac’s notebook and readings on the beanbag beside him. 

Cormac and Louis have been extremely close friends for years now, going all the way back to fifth grade. They use to be known as the funny and careless duo of their class, partially why they matched so well. They played Rugby and football together. They got in trouble together. They’ve seen the principal, vice principal, and about three other administrators down that chain—together. But came high school, Cormac unexpectedly started to think twice before acting. He had begun doing his work, getting involved with projects, and building good relationships with teachers. He still had hints of his younger days; Cormac could still birth laughters in his friends out of silence. It was not that he completely changed as a person, he just allocated more time to serious affairs. He still hung out with Louis, though they were no longer the inseparable twins, since Louis was still the same Louis. He would incessantly try to get Cormac to come out, and Cormac would usually reply with Can’t, I got work Louis. During the times when Cormac was busy, Louis would go and hang out with some other friends. And when those other friends were busy, he would go find other people to rendezvous. For the past year or so, Cormac and Louis stayed connected, talked a little during school, and met occasionally outside. Tonight was one of those nights. Sneaking in and out of Cormac’s place has become muscle memory for the two of them from years of experience, but what was relatively new was weed. They smoked for the first time almost a year ago, and the novel sensation gripped their teenage hearts so strongly, they were still under its spell, even Cormac. What use to be UNO sessions and video games now turned into smoking and cruising. It was hard to differentiate which was better. Perhaps it was just a sign of the time. That’s what Cormac thought. 

“Let’s go to the lake spot today yea? To smoke this.” Louis said, squinting his eyes so he could tuck the filter into the joint tightly. 

“Oh, the one in here? Yeah sure, that’s a classic.”

“Then, we’ll go on a joyride haha. I got my moped outside, all charged up.” 

After Louis finished rolling the joint, he packed his stuff up while Cormac remembered to wear an extra layer. Cormac cautiously turned his balcony door knob, as if the quaint sound of a door’s movement would immediately spawn his parents. With the door opened, the swallowing nighttime awaited them, in which they entered, into a place with no lights, a place with no visible horizons. 

§

Willows swooshed as water skipped. Moon-sparkled dragonflies glided past the surface while tadpoles wiggled within. Brown and green leaves alike submitted to their autumn demise, floating like mindless corpses through the pagoda arch, resting beside the soft pile of fresh ash. The orchestration of screeching cicadas and gurgling frogs told the audience just how deep into the night they were, but Cormac and Louis didn’t mind one bit. The reddened ember advanced down the thin chimney as Louis filled his mouth with smoke. Before handing the joint to Cormac, he tapped it ever so slightly on the edge of the bench, sending a rain of grey flakes down onto the stone cold floor. 

“Careful with it, it’s close to canoeing,” warned Louis.

Nodding in agreement, Cormac took the joint in between his thumb and index finger. While he aggravated the ember with his deep but slow breaths, he steadily rotated the mouthpiece, attempting to evenly distribute the inhaling breaths. Fiery white smoke laced with chemicals began occupying every corner of his mouth, and Cormac felt it with his every sensation. One big gulp of the cool night air was used to push all the smoke down into his lungs, burning everything along the way, though it was not as harsh as usual. 

“Wow, this one’s nice. I don’t really cough with it. And I am definitely feeling it.”

“I’m telling you man, this new shit that Jackson found is way better than the ones we were smoking,” responded Louis.

“Facts.”

Cormac took another hit from the joint before handing it back to Louis. The cold air made each exhale of smoke seem more filled than it really was, possibly making the two teenagers feel higher than they are thanks to the psychological weapon that is placebo.

“Aye by the way, how about Japan! Maybe partially because I’m envisioning it through Murakami’s pencil, but god wouldn’t that be nice? Not sure if there are any feasible colleges out there though, imma have to take a look when I get back. Maybe cuz I’m a lil high, but I feel like I could learn japa…”

“Aye cut that traveling and college shit out now bro. How come these days, especially today actually, you always be thinking about something that’s over a year down the line? Let’s talk about something else, or simply listen to the night, it sounds nice when you are high. I can’t think about that stuff when I’m high bro,” Louis responded as he exhaled from his hit.

“But Louis, think about it. Wouldn’t it be dope if we could go live somewhere else? See some new environments, new girls, new people, and also smoke some new weed! Imagine if we be doing this shit in Europe! Think about it, imagine it.”

During Cormac’s repeated pitch, Louis hastily took three hits of the joint without hesitation or break, dispelling the socializing aspect of smoking, treating it almost like a job, a responsibility, something that sadly just had to be done.

“Here, smoke more of this. Judging from what you spilling right now, you definitely not high enough.”

Using his finger, Cormac swiped the ash off of the tip, then stuck the other end between his lips. Again, he sent the blazing weed down into his body. With every exhale of smoke, Cormac felt bits of his consciousness drift away with his breath, joining the light breeze as they aimlessly wandered through the dark. 

“Smoking and chilling in Europe do sound a little nice. Still aye, I don’t know why you don’t wanna stay with us. You know all the people that already decided right? Rob, Derek, Alisa, Jihoon, Jack, and others. Another four years with the same crew? Here in Shanghai? We all gonna keep it going bro. Whatever, how is it going now, 1-10?”

Cormac felt like his ears registered what Louis said regarding staying here, but he couldn’t hold the thought in place within his mind. All he acknowledged was the question Louis asked every time they neared the end of the joint. 

“mmm probably like a seven or eight now, it is getting there haha.”

“Hahaha yes! Same, I’d say imma be at like an eight once I finish this little clip. Let’s go on the routes near the 200’s houses, through that tunnel!” Louis exclaimed while he tried to kill what was left of the joint.

“Ooooo hahah! Right right, the ol’ faithful.”

Cormac sat silently on the bench as the tensed muscles that formed his smile was loosening by the second. Thoughts were running through his head, that much could be inferred.

“Yo wait, actually I have a great idea. What about we go find a new rollercoaster in Evergreen? The compound that Heath lives in. From what I remember, there are some huge bridges there.” Cormac suddenly added.

Louis flicked the deceased joint into the river, sending ripples along the surface.

“Nah come on, we love that 200 route. Plus, we’re here already, might as well. Evergreen could also not let us in this late, we don’t know. And after we done with the route, it's way faster to get to your place to chill after. Quit complaining now Cormac, you don’t got a moped, I’m the one with the ride.” Louis said, standing up and walking towards his electric motorcycle. Despite his desire to explore that new compound, the cannabinoid influence rendered anything extremely amusing, exciting, and contenting, making Cormac spring to his feet at the sound of Louis’s declaration. 

  The two high schoolers got on the sleek, black motorcycle with scratches and cracks on the side.Though common among international students, the speed these electrical motorcycles could attain technically rendered them illegal in Shanghai. But the excessive speed was what exhilarated the two smoked-up teenagers, especially Louis. Weed and speed gave Louis an adrenaline that was unmatched by anything else. If smoking in these compounds is the most fun thing to do, Louis would think, why waste the time and sacrifice it for other inferior activities? All of the nonsmokers will catch on soon enough after they try it for the first time. Louis’s perspective and reliance on weed had been slowly infecting Cormac over the year, though not enough to sicken him yet. His immune system continued to stand strong. 

“Myyyy godddd we running running!! Louis get on that small road!” Cormac cried as Louis reached 60 kilometers per hour on his charged-up motorcycle. As usual, they flew without breaks through the small paths intersecting rivers and forestry. Tight bends and big turns were manageable maneuvers for Louis, and the slim chance of a fall was what kept his hand on the accelerator. Fear was part of it for them. Though they had traversed these paths countless times, knowing that they could easily crash and not knowing when it could happen was what kept the routes refreshing. Depending on their answer to the 1-10 question, the path’s familiarity could start breaking down as well. The small paths all looked relatively similar, making it easy for the two fuddled teenagers to forget which path they were on and what destination it would lead to. The path Cormac suggested took them from houses averaging 100s to where it neared 200. 

“GawDAM that path was long, felt like we couldn’t get out of it. Oh, we’re here?!”

“Where, what do you mean,” Cormac asked. “Ahh I see, turn right here then, If we plan on going to the tunnel.”

“This city really is so unique and beautiful. But yea of course we going to the finale. Let’s gooo!!” 

With this proclamation, Louis suddenly flicked his right wrist up, aggravating the accelerator and sending the motorcycle, and Cormac, well on their way to the infamous tunnel ride. Despite it not being an actual tunnel, it earned the title because of the consuming dense vegetation surrounding the straight path that created a warp hole of leaves and branches. When Louis first started bringing Cormac on these motorcycle rides, he would always end it by going through the tunnel. The exhalation of it was unparalleled to the other paths. Presently, Louis has stopped the bike right before the bend of the tunnel. 

“Don’t hold onto my waist Cormac, that’s some questionable behavior. Man, you ready? I sure am high, I hope I can stay straight enough for the tunnel.”

“Don’t scare me like that haha, just keep your dam eyes open Louis. No benefit in blinding your vision of what’s ahead.”

“Alright alright, you pussy. Here we go.”

Louis propelled them around the bend, accelerating as the seconds ticked on until the long, straight path wide enough for one and a half person to walk on was in sight. Nervous screams and sounds mingled with innocent happiness and excitement emitted from both riders as Louis dashed full throttle down the path. Leaves slapped their shoulders, branches skimmed their arms. Both of them leaned forward and ducked their head down in order to, as Louis would say, increase the aerodynamics of the glide and the thrill of the ride. The amplification of the high made it so they felt lost. It made them feel like this tight tunnel, with whooshing sounds dashing past them, was like a portal to another dimension. With the headlights off, shadows enveloped the path ahead. If not a portal, it was a destabilizing space that elevated them above ground, monetarily persuading them that they weren’t two 18-year-olds riding an electrical motorcycle down their community footpath. 

“AH, shit, Aye! The branches are getting me. I gotta go faster!” 

But for some reason, the illusionary spell didn’t work on Cormac for the first time in his memory. He had tried to squeal in exhilaration with Louis, but he found that his screams carried no emotions. Cormac stopped squinting his eyes in fear and widened them till his face hurts. Bit by bit, he lifted his head up from its reclusion, and sternly looked towards the end of the path. The eight-out-of-ten he answered Louis back at the pagoda was now down to a zero. He concretely recognized that this was no portal nor some fictional midland. He definitively knew that they were riding down a path on the south side of the compound, and he knew that this path would not lead to some faraway land; it would come out on a side street, where the Chen family lived on one end, and Jasper lived on the other. Sitting on the back of Louis’s motorcycle and traversing these narrow paths no longer seemed like a rollercoaster to him, but instead, a plain merry-go-around that went in circles, round and round again, with no clear exit. Usually the most exciting part of the ride, Louis could be heard shrieking like an alarm as the end of the path approached. Cormac could not match his childhood best friend’s excitement, because he knew his desirable destination, and it wasn’t what was approaching them. 

All the commotion and uproars came to a halt as they came out of the tunnel. Once again, they were devoured by the deafening stillness of the night. 

“wooo I almost forgot how nice that tunnel is. You lucky you live right here man. How was that?”

“Yeah, It was nice. Um,  let’s ride back to my place.” 

The tone of Cormac caught Louis off guard. Putting trust in their years of friendship, he decided to not think too much about it and turned right en route to number 77. 

 §

“Hey just stop here, I don’t want to wake my parents.”

“What do you mean? Aren’t we going to chill in your room?”

“Nah, I think I’m gonna call it early tonight,” Cormac said as he got off the motorcycle. 

“Bro why, let’s hang! I still have more weed.”

“Louis I don’t think I can tonight. I just suddenly got really tired. And I have something tomorrow as well.”

“Alright, fine. Hey are you okay today?”

“I’m fine, just tired like I said. Tired from a lot of things.”

“Rest up then Cormac, I’ll see you soon aight? And stop tripping on that college shit my brother, it’s gonna be an easy decision in the end, and you know what I’m talking about. Peace!”

Louis rode off, the electric revving of his motorcycle gradually dismissed from afar. Cormac turned and started walking towards his house. He took the new route when climbing up his balcony, which he thought was indeed easier. Cormac turned the doorknob just as steadily as before, returning him to his brightly lit, cramped room at the end of the left hallway of the second floor. Instead of sleeping like he told Louis he would, he grabbed his computer off the beanbag and continued searching for new routes, ones that hopefully would not eventually lead back to the same side street.